Healthy boundaries & the Overindulged Child

If you are a mother of a young child I would highly recommend you to get involved with a MOPS in your area. I've joined MOPS about a year in a half ago and it has been such a HUGE help with advice in parenting.
Last week we had a child therapist come in and share in setting boundaries and the overindulged child. Wow! What a great talk he shared with us. I think a huge problem that moms face is knowing when and how to start putting into place the boundaries that kids need and when your kids want things, how much is too much! Sometimes I also think that as woman we tend to try to act like we've got it all figured out, but in reality we don't have a clue! Parenting is such a HUGE journey, and just when you think you've got it all figured out, you don't!
Ken broke down the morning into 3 catagories:
1. Giving the child too much and too many things (Anything they what they get it)
2. Over-Nurturing your child (Doing things that they should and could do, like putting on clothes, tieing shoes, school work)
3. Soft Structure (Too much freedom too soon. are not consistant with rules in place, lack in discipline)

As I heard these 3 points I thought I was doing it all right for the most part, well then we starting digging deeper and I realized I have a TON to work on. I think it's so hard to find that balance on not giving your kid too much. I can think about Christmas coming up and how we all love to go overboard and buy our kids so many gifts, because we want to see their faces and them to have the best Christmas ever. Sometimes we lose the meaning of Christmas because we so wrapped up in buying the next gift. I think that becoming aware of what your kids have and need and knowing what is really practical and neccessary and what is not. This will help us in the process of what to get them. The over nurturing part, I kind of had to laugh, because I do find myself getting so impatient that I put on my kids shoes because they take forever! It's so easy to do things yourself, then waitiing that extra 5 minutes. I realized with that point that I'm only crippling my kids when I do everything for them. Lastly the soft structure, now Dave is SO much better then me at this. If you are a stay at home mom it gets really difficult not to slack in the rules an diciplining. Because your with your kids all the time, you don't want them to feel like your the crazy woman with all these rules and spankings all the time. Let's face it, kids and their behavior wears on you and it's easy to not follow the rules and lack in discipline. I've really come to realize that it is SO dangerous when you have a soft structure. Kids need consistent rules and structure because they are so smart and will try every second to get their ways if you let them.
Being a mom and a parent there is a lot to learn, but it's important not to act like you know what your doing all the time. I would suggest getting involved with a moms group, reading parenting books, find a woman who has successfully raised her family and asked her questions. There are so many ways to better ourselves as parents, we just have to be willing to find those ways.